June 2012
nicoosuxx:
mom stop complaining and just let me be fergalicious for once
mydogsmokes:
but there aren’t even 500 days in the summer thats stupid
The more I watch "Keeping Up...Kardashians," the...
preppyprincesslove:
“You’re looking a little red, Disick.”
“It will turn chocolate before you know it, sweet thing.”
microwavepizzaoven:
is vitamin water still good for me if i put vodka in it
OH MY GOD
My boss just texted me asking to come into work at 4:30 in the morning and I threw my phone down and was like “you’re such a faggot I fucking hate you” and then I heard the Siri confirmation noise and I picked up my phone and
clavid:
you may think its funny to make fun of my friends but one day youre gonna come home from school and the house is going to smell so good and you’re going to go hey mom whats cooking and your moms going to turn around and its going to be me in a mom wig and im going to say “YOUR DOG” and open the oven and theres your dog cooking up
apatows:
scott is my favorite kardashian sister
batreaux:
Mr Jones, we’d love to take your key witness testimony for this trial but unfortunately nobody likes tattletales, get out of my courtroom
